Why can’t we watch our child’s dance class?

Once you have enrolled your child into dance classes, we understand the excitement you have. All you want to do is watch your child progress and snap those adorable photos of them. Then, you find out after enrolling that the classes are closed to viewers… Why is that? What do you mean I can’t even watch my own dancer?

There are a TON of reasons why we (and nearly every dance studio) close our class doors to parents. We want to help explain the reasoning behind our policy in an attempt to create a smoother evening of classes each week. It is important to note, with our youngest levels we do have some exceptions (Tiny Tots – as needed and Carle Cuties – first classes are perfectly ok).

1. Simple truth

The truth is, students focus best on learning when it’s just them and a teacher in the room. A teacher in a class with no parent observers is more focused, productive and a far better response from each student. Likewise, this provides an opportunity of teachers to establish behavioral boundaries and build trust and rapport faster than a class with parents watching. 

2. It is very distracting

There will always be someone who forgot to turn their phones off, laugh at a funny moment (we have plenty of funny moments!) whisper or even chat loudly with a parent next to you. Not only are these things distracting to the teacher, but imagine the distraction to a full class of little people. If you’ve ever taught a large group of small children, you can appreciate the fact that the cute little dancers provide enough distractions as it is.

“Guess what I’m having for dinner?”

“I got a paper cut last week, can I have a bandaid?”

“My Grandma is coming this weekend!”

“We’re bringing so-and-so home from class today!” (700x’s in one class)

This doesn’t even address the bathroom breaks (power of suggestion at its finest!) and random parents popping in – even to drop off a water bottle. 

We need zero additional assistance providing class distractions 🙂

Likewise, there are no parents to wait in the hallway during class. Voices echo into the room and it is extremely distracting. Beyond that, at this point in time, we have no other bodies in the building while we are teaching, so when we hear someone or see someone pass the doorway we go into safety mode, trying to determine who is in the building. At that point, we lose complete focus of, both dancers and teachers. We hope that you will be respectful of this policy. Please feel free to go to Wegmans, Starbucks, Yoga Body Shop juice lounge, Pour House – or even sit in your car, read or chat on the phone with a friend.  

As a parent, I love watching my children participate in their chosen activities. I love watching them because of how it makes me feel… Which really isn’t taking into account how my presence in their environment makes them feel or effects their practice performance.

Again, as a parent speaking form experience, 45 to 90 minutes of kid free time is GOLD. We all deserve to have some uninterrupted “me” time to do things we enjoy, and that includes both you and your kids. 

3. You lose the element of surprise!

One of the greatest perks of Irish Dance is the opportunity for many public performances throughout the year. If you are constantly trying to watch or peek into the classes every time your child is training, you lose the great element of surprise. There is nothing more thrilling than coming to a performance and seeing the growth in your child. Change and progress happen over time. If you are always watching classes, you won’t notice the drastic changes that occur over a few months time. I am telling you from firsthand experience, hold off on the peaking in class and wait to be surprised at the next viewing event. You will be much more proud and impressed with your child!! 

4. It can make other students uncomfortable.

While your child might be okay with you peeking in, other children may react in a very different way. We are dealing with all types of personalities in one room, and to make sure all of the students feel comfortable enough to express themselves is one of our top priorities. In the mindset of kids, they can often feel as though they are being judged when someone is watching them practice. 

Think about all of the community performances we have throughout the year. RARELY, do we ever perform in the same location twice in one year. So, imagine the potential anxieties any little one could have over public performances. Can you imagine the level of confidence needed for these dancers to show up at brand new venues, with hundreds of eyes staring at them as the contracted event entertainment?

That confidence is built in the studio, in a trusting environment where our students are nurtured and encouraged by their teachers, safe from judgement or criticism. So, while you would surely never intend on making any student feel insecure, it is a very legitimate possibility that we avoid at all costs. 

5. A parent’s role in their child’s extracurricular endeavor is to be supportive

When parents watch practices – it can lead to comments outside of this supportive and encouraging role. We find ourselves saying things such as “You should pay better attention to your teacher when they are talking.” or “You kept using the wrong foot, you need to be more focused.” or “I sure wish you would try harder.” When we watch practices, we open the door to talking about a part of our child’s dance experience we should not be talking about, ever, period.

6. Sometimes it’s better not to know.

It’s better not to know if our child isn’t paying attention, or if our child is struggling with the newest steps, or if our child is not working as hard as we know they can. It’s better not to know because when we do know these things, the stress creeps in. What our child needs to receive from us is our support, not our stress. They need to know that we believe in their ability to be their best. When our child feels our stress, they hear “You should have done better” instead of “I believe in your ability to be your best.

Please know, this policy was not created out of spite. It is simply the most ethical and professional route to offering a quality dance class, growing technically sound dancers and most importantly, safe, secure and self assured young humans.  – Siobhan